The Giftcard

So, giftcards can be OK in some circumstances... despite the fact that they shout, "I don't know you well enough to pick out a present for you," or perhaps, "I didn't feel like taking the time or energy to find something meaningful so I'm giving you money but you have to use it here."

Yes, a giftcard allows you to go ahead and choose your own gift. It also eliminates a potential return or exchange. But what about the excitement of tearing open paper to reveal something substantial? That's gone right out the window!



In essence, giftcards are "the easy way out" because they allow the gift giver to:
1. Make it look like they put thought into it by driving to a store to turn their green bills into a little plastic card of equal value.
2. Avoid browsing through stores.
3. Get something quick and simple.

Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Buying a gift for someone should be an enjoyable and thoughtful experience... duh!

And if it's a small amount, doesn't it irk you to know how much money seemed reasonable to the giver? A giftcard of $10 buys you absolutely nothing. Yes, it's a gift... but what could I possibly buy with a lousy $10 in today's economy?!

If you insist on giving monetary gifts... just stick with the cash ("Give me the money!"). Then, you can avoid the effort of getting the giftcard in the first place and allow the recipient to buy something of their choice anywhere they want (not like the restriction of a giftcard) or even put the money in the bank (Gasp, who would've thought?).

5 Rules of Gift Giving: Who You Should Give Gifts to

1. Parents
They gave birth to you! It's as simple as that. Therefore, no matter what, they deserve to get some appreciation.

2. Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles
We all have that aunt of grandma who spoils you rotten with anything your little heart desires and so much more. Shouldn't they get something cute-sy and heartfelt in return?

3. Siblings and Cousins
Just because you may fight with them, go through phases of wanting nothing to do with eachother or simply have some awkward interactions, doesn't mean you shouldn't give them gifts. Most likely they're the closest family members in age, so shouldn't you have a general idea of what your peers like?

4. Friends and Roommates
This is a no-brainer. If you are friends with someone, you exchange gifts! Forgetting a friend at Christmas-time or at his or her birthday leaves tension in the air with a hint of "maybe we really aren't that close..."

5. Teachers, Co-workers, Bosses
People you look up to, admire or work under should know how you feel! (Or maybe in the case of a boss... they shouldn't) So get them something that says, "You are great!" or something like it.

The Gift That's Two Sizes Too Small

Nothing is more discouraging than receiving a shirt or sweatshirt (or any item of clothing for that matter) that doesn't fit you. Maybe it's that aunt who lives across the country and has a little trouble keeping up with how fast you're growing... so she buys you clothes you probably would've worn two years ago. Maybe it's the penny-pincher of the family, buying you T-shirts that "you'll grow into."



Either way, undersized or oversized outfits are only cool if you intend them to be cool... but these gifts pretty much always are not. Is it really that hard to call someone up and ask them how tall their child is? Or maybe look at some recent pictures?

Clothes that are the perfect color or have a neat design somehow manage not to score the perfect score when they could fit someone half your size.

The Gift in Disguise

We are all familiar with the gifts that are given not only for the benefit of the recipient: the husband who buys a large screen television for his wife, the girlfriend who bakes a cake for her boyfriend for Valentine's Day.

But I'm sure that you've never heard of a mother giving this to her ten year old son for his birthday:

A blender and a hairdryer.

"What?!" That's the first thing that went through my mind when I heard this as I let out a little laugh. This is the most extreme "gift in disguise" that I have heard about. Clearly, no little boy is going to have any use for these unless he is a budding chef with long hair. Needless to say, this gift was barely disguised!

Unless it is a gift that is made to be mutually used and enjoyed, such as that big TV or yummy chocolate cake, these gifts aren't really gifts. They also completely go against the idea of giving as a means of giving of one's self and feeling happy by pleasing others. Buying things for yourself isn't bad, but when you need to use the cover of a gift for someone else, it's pretty heartless.

The Gifts That Never End

Most cities or towns have some sort of merchandise line made specifically for tourists. Snow globes, sweatshirts, sweatpants, T-shirts, postcards, shells, bags or beach towels: you name it, they make it.

As many grandparents do, mine lived in Florida for the winter months every year while I was growing up... Bonita Springs, FL to be exact. I can't recall visiting, but I know that we took a trip down when I was three to see them over Christmas which was the only time I went.

However, each year, my grandmother felt that I needed to have new things from Bonita Springs. Most of the time it was the T-shirts that were several sizes too large: the bright blue ones with jumping dolphins; the yellow ones with old-lady hat designs; the plain white and gray ones with beach scenes and glittery shells; the pale pink ones with flowers; and all with BONITA SPRINGS, FLORIDA splashed across the front.

The horrifying part about these shirts is not that I have a few hiding in a corner... No, I have enough of them from over the years to open up my own store. Literally. Aside from all of the "normal" shirts that I simply didn't like wearing, one section of my closet was dedicated entirely to piles of Bonita Springs paraphernalia.

While some tourist-y gifts are acceptable, going overboard is really not acceptable! So know when to stop buying T-shirts with shells and city name blurbs because if we wanted them, we would ask for them!

5 Rules of Gift Giving: When to Give a Gift

And shame on you if you don't!

1. Birthdays
Throughout your life you have one day every year that is centered around you! Just you! Waking up on your birthday morning to a celebration of another year of life that you have experienced is extraordinary. So, it's pretty reasonable to bank on a little extra love and kisses coming your way... and presents. Now that most people have a Facebook, there is no excuse for forgetting a birthday.

2. Anniversaries
OK, so maybe not weekly anniversaries or even monthly anniversaries, but you have to admit that the big ones in a relationship are worth acknowledging. If you don't do something special for your first 6-month or 1-year anniversary you might want to rethink. It doesn't have to be huge! Even a small gesture like making a special dinner and dessert or spending the night out acts as a gift to the both of you, making your anniversary that much more special.

3. Holidays
Whether it is a religious holiday or family/relationship-oriented (this includes Mother's and Father's Day!), holidays are a great way to show others our appreciation and feel fulfilled by sharing with our loved ones. Whether they celebrate the same holidays or not, these small gestures are what bring people closer together. You can go all out, as some do at Christmas, or keep it low-key. But it is important to acknowledge these little days throughout the year by giving to others.

4. Souvenirs From a Trip
Your sister goes to France and comes back with... nothing for you? You don't need to buy out the country but it is definitely a good idea to come home with a few little trinkets for some friends or family members. One of my friends and my older cousin often travel abroad; many times they have returned with jewelry and pottery that has indigenous stones and designs. Bringing back little items for your loved ones allows them to live vicariously through you in your travels across the country or around the world.

5. Just Because
Doesn't it make you feel special to get a little box or sparkly bag when you aren't expecting it? I know I do! Along with the spirit of giving, a surprise gift is the most unexpected and sometimes the most exciting. These just-because gifts remind your loved ones that you're thinking about them and want to acknowledge it, even when there isn't a birthday or holiday nearby.

The Gift That Made Me Blush

Sometimes it is difficult to determine age-limits or maturity-levels when choosing gifts for preteens. For some items, however, it should be pretty obvious that it is just not something appropriate to give to a twelve-year-old.

At the age of twelve I had been involved with the music department at my school for three years. My whole family is very musical and my very non-musical grandmother tries very hard to be involved with all of the concerts and activities that we do. Working my way through my gifts from her that Christmas, I was shocked as I ripped the paper of one away to reveal this book:



Just to, uh, point out what seems to be obvious to me: the two glaring aspects of the cover that would set off alarm bells that this is probably not the best gift for a twelve-year-old...
1. The title includes "SEX" and "DRUGS"
2. The characters in the artwork are missing something rather important: some clothes

In my grandmother's case she probably only saw "Mozart," and knowing that I play an instrument and like to read, figured that this would be a nice present. In any case, it is so important to glance over covers and packaging to make sure it really is exactly what you think it is.