The Gifts That Never End

Most cities or towns have some sort of merchandise line made specifically for tourists. Snow globes, sweatshirts, sweatpants, T-shirts, postcards, shells, bags or beach towels: you name it, they make it.

As many grandparents do, mine lived in Florida for the winter months every year while I was growing up... Bonita Springs, FL to be exact. I can't recall visiting, but I know that we took a trip down when I was three to see them over Christmas which was the only time I went.

However, each year, my grandmother felt that I needed to have new things from Bonita Springs. Most of the time it was the T-shirts that were several sizes too large: the bright blue ones with jumping dolphins; the yellow ones with old-lady hat designs; the plain white and gray ones with beach scenes and glittery shells; the pale pink ones with flowers; and all with BONITA SPRINGS, FLORIDA splashed across the front.

The horrifying part about these shirts is not that I have a few hiding in a corner... No, I have enough of them from over the years to open up my own store. Literally. Aside from all of the "normal" shirts that I simply didn't like wearing, one section of my closet was dedicated entirely to piles of Bonita Springs paraphernalia.

While some tourist-y gifts are acceptable, going overboard is really not acceptable! So know when to stop buying T-shirts with shells and city name blurbs because if we wanted them, we would ask for them!

5 Rules of Gift Giving: When to Give a Gift

And shame on you if you don't!

1. Birthdays
Throughout your life you have one day every year that is centered around you! Just you! Waking up on your birthday morning to a celebration of another year of life that you have experienced is extraordinary. So, it's pretty reasonable to bank on a little extra love and kisses coming your way... and presents. Now that most people have a Facebook, there is no excuse for forgetting a birthday.

2. Anniversaries
OK, so maybe not weekly anniversaries or even monthly anniversaries, but you have to admit that the big ones in a relationship are worth acknowledging. If you don't do something special for your first 6-month or 1-year anniversary you might want to rethink. It doesn't have to be huge! Even a small gesture like making a special dinner and dessert or spending the night out acts as a gift to the both of you, making your anniversary that much more special.

3. Holidays
Whether it is a religious holiday or family/relationship-oriented (this includes Mother's and Father's Day!), holidays are a great way to show others our appreciation and feel fulfilled by sharing with our loved ones. Whether they celebrate the same holidays or not, these small gestures are what bring people closer together. You can go all out, as some do at Christmas, or keep it low-key. But it is important to acknowledge these little days throughout the year by giving to others.

4. Souvenirs From a Trip
Your sister goes to France and comes back with... nothing for you? You don't need to buy out the country but it is definitely a good idea to come home with a few little trinkets for some friends or family members. One of my friends and my older cousin often travel abroad; many times they have returned with jewelry and pottery that has indigenous stones and designs. Bringing back little items for your loved ones allows them to live vicariously through you in your travels across the country or around the world.

5. Just Because
Doesn't it make you feel special to get a little box or sparkly bag when you aren't expecting it? I know I do! Along with the spirit of giving, a surprise gift is the most unexpected and sometimes the most exciting. These just-because gifts remind your loved ones that you're thinking about them and want to acknowledge it, even when there isn't a birthday or holiday nearby.

The Gift That Made Me Blush

Sometimes it is difficult to determine age-limits or maturity-levels when choosing gifts for preteens. For some items, however, it should be pretty obvious that it is just not something appropriate to give to a twelve-year-old.

At the age of twelve I had been involved with the music department at my school for three years. My whole family is very musical and my very non-musical grandmother tries very hard to be involved with all of the concerts and activities that we do. Working my way through my gifts from her that Christmas, I was shocked as I ripped the paper of one away to reveal this book:



Just to, uh, point out what seems to be obvious to me: the two glaring aspects of the cover that would set off alarm bells that this is probably not the best gift for a twelve-year-old...
1. The title includes "SEX" and "DRUGS"
2. The characters in the artwork are missing something rather important: some clothes

In my grandmother's case she probably only saw "Mozart," and knowing that I play an instrument and like to read, figured that this would be a nice present. In any case, it is so important to glance over covers and packaging to make sure it really is exactly what you think it is.

The Gift That Breaks The Piggy Bank

Giving cash as a gift is its own mix of pleasure and pain. For the gift-giver, it comes with the feeling of generosity and knowledge that the recipient will be able to do whatever they want with it. For the gift-receiver, it eludes this freedom to choose-your-own-gift.

But if you think it's always nice to get cold hard cash as a gift, maybe you've just been dealing with the 20's and 100's that aunts and grandmas throw your way. However, cash gifts can be painful: they bluntly show exactly what the person 'spent,' possibly making you feel either guilty or shorted.

At my seventh grade birthday one of my presents was a ziplock freezer bag with money; not just some bills, but probably all of the bills and change my friend had. I still get the image of a little girl with a hammer breaking open her piggy bank, the crumpled bills and mixed coins spilling onto the floor.

While cash gifts can be humbling, showing the generosity of our friends and family, they can also make you feel awkward and uncomfortable. So, don't break open your piggy bank with all that change just for a birthday gift! Or at least head over to the bank and drop it in a machine to get the bill equivalent of all those quarters and dimes. In the interest of the gift-giver: don't empty your life savings on a normal occasion for a gift. And in the interest of the gift-receiver, if you're going to go all out, don't let us know!

The Not-So-Personalized Gift

We've all seen the rotating racks with the little notepads, the stationary, the stickers, the mugs with cute designs and the packages of pens that come with an array of name labels from Aaron to Zachary. Then there are the bags with the names stitched in, the backpacks, the t-shirts, the towels, the jewelry and even the picture frames. If you wanted to give someone a gift with their name on it this seems like a sweet, personal idea. Except when the "gift" has their name spelled wrong.

Growing up, this annoyed me to no end. Apparently these companies have no idea that the name Aly exists.

ALI. ALLI. ALLIE. ALLY.

NO.

IT'S ALY. A-L-Y.

Despite this, I have been given the pens labelled with ALLISON. Old notepads with ALISON written in cursive on the front. A hand-made necklace with beads A-L-I. Letters from my own grandmother starting with Dear ALLIE.

Of course, "it's the thought that counts," but in the end it is not my name and that gift is something that should've stayed on the shelves, waiting for a little girl who actually spells her name that way.

I'm a college student and an only child, so growing up I have had the luxury of being bombarded with all sorts of gifts. I take pride in my own gift-giving abilities and know that unique feeling of getting a gift that you absolutely hate, makes you feel awkward or simply makes you wonder what the person was thinking when they picked it out. Maybe this blog will eliminate some other awkward exchanges?