Hopefully, if nothing else, this blog has been some small source of amusement for you (whoever you are reading this page). Maybe I've unknowingly shaken you by the shoulders with my harsh words that told you that the gift you selected was simply bad. And maybe I've made you roll your eyes at my posts, disbelieving their truth (you best start believin' cuz they're true!)
But I really hope that I've made you reconsider items that you give as gifts because the silent message that is sent hand-in-hand with your gift is just as important because it is a reflection of you and your feelings about the person you're giving the gift to. I refuse to tell you what to get because that is all up to you. Just remember to put yourself in the receiver's shoes and think about whether you would want that *cough* whatever you're holding in your hands contemplating buying.
There are some items that should just never be given as gifts (OK, maybe unless it is a joke). But this is not a joke: in all seriousness 95% of people do not want these gifts! Yeah, I just made that up but I'm sure it's pretty close.
So take this newfound knowledge, fellow gift-givers, on what not to give as a gift and put it to good use!
Wednesday, April 28, 2010
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
The Queen of the Re-Gift
A couple months ago I had a scheduled dentist visit. My usual hygienist is very touchy-feely and loves talking about things going on in her life. Since it was shortly after Christmas, she had a story for me about some gifts she and her family received from her wealthy, elderly aunt.
She had received [another] long nightgown. Not only was it cheap material but it was clearly "old lady print" (you know what I'm talking about... little flower buds, pale colors). Something she clearly did not like and so, gave away.
While this wasn't so much of a strange re-gifting, my hygienist's pre-teen son got something much more interesting.
He received a package of Icy Hot packs. OK, this is a pretty strange gift for a young kid, is it not? Unless he is an athlete who had an injury (which he was not). But it wasn't just a regular package. It was an opened package and one of the thermal care wraps was missing.
If you're going to re-gift something that you don't like, make an attempt to put some thought into what it is you are re-gifting and who you are giving it to. Don't you want it to at least seem like you're being thoughtful and genuine?
She had received [another] long nightgown. Not only was it cheap material but it was clearly "old lady print" (you know what I'm talking about... little flower buds, pale colors). Something she clearly did not like and so, gave away.
While this wasn't so much of a strange re-gifting, my hygienist's pre-teen son got something much more interesting.
He received a package of Icy Hot packs. OK, this is a pretty strange gift for a young kid, is it not? Unless he is an athlete who had an injury (which he was not). But it wasn't just a regular package. It was an opened package and one of the thermal care wraps was missing.
If you're going to re-gift something that you don't like, make an attempt to put some thought into what it is you are re-gifting and who you are giving it to. Don't you want it to at least seem like you're being thoughtful and genuine?
Thursday, April 8, 2010
The Ugly Sweater
Despite the "Ugly Sweater" parties that have recently become a hit at colleges, let's not kid ourselves and say we enjoyed getting these sweaters when we were younger. An ugly sweater is just ugly in ever way, there's no getting around it. It might be the hideous arrangement and mixture of colors, or the chaotic designs that fill every inch of the scratchy fabric. It might be the shape of it... lumpy or awkward. Or, it might just be the tacky holiday pictures and fabric cut-outs that catch your attention immediately from 50 feet away.
Maybe these are cute when you're giving it to a 1-year-old but seriously, think about your own primitive years and please, please talk yourself out buying it for anyone. Even though exists, this does not mean you should be buying them.
Maybe these are cute when you're giving it to a 1-year-old but seriously, think about your own primitive years and please, please talk yourself out buying it for anyone. Even though exists, this does not mean you should be buying them.
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
The Giftcard
So, giftcards can be OK in some circumstances... despite the fact that they shout, "I don't know you well enough to pick out a present for you," or perhaps, "I didn't feel like taking the time or energy to find something meaningful so I'm giving you money but you have to use it here."
Yes, a giftcard allows you to go ahead and choose your own gift. It also eliminates a potential return or exchange. But what about the excitement of tearing open paper to reveal something substantial? That's gone right out the window!
In essence, giftcards are "the easy way out" because they allow the gift giver to:
1. Make it look like they put thought into it by driving to a store to turn their green bills into a little plastic card of equal value.
2. Avoid browsing through stores.
3. Get something quick and simple.
Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Buying a gift for someone should be an enjoyable and thoughtful experience... duh!
And if it's a small amount, doesn't it irk you to know how much money seemed reasonable to the giver? A giftcard of $10 buys you absolutely nothing. Yes, it's a gift... but what could I possibly buy with a lousy $10 in today's economy?!
If you insist on giving monetary gifts... just stick with the cash ("Give me the money!"). Then, you can avoid the effort of getting the giftcard in the first place and allow the recipient to buy something of their choice anywhere they want (not like the restriction of a giftcard) or even put the money in the bank (Gasp, who would've thought?).
Yes, a giftcard allows you to go ahead and choose your own gift. It also eliminates a potential return or exchange. But what about the excitement of tearing open paper to reveal something substantial? That's gone right out the window!
In essence, giftcards are "the easy way out" because they allow the gift giver to:
1. Make it look like they put thought into it by driving to a store to turn their green bills into a little plastic card of equal value.
2. Avoid browsing through stores.
3. Get something quick and simple.
Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Buying a gift for someone should be an enjoyable and thoughtful experience... duh!
And if it's a small amount, doesn't it irk you to know how much money seemed reasonable to the giver? A giftcard of $10 buys you absolutely nothing. Yes, it's a gift... but what could I possibly buy with a lousy $10 in today's economy?!
If you insist on giving monetary gifts... just stick with the cash ("Give me the money!"). Then, you can avoid the effort of getting the giftcard in the first place and allow the recipient to buy something of their choice anywhere they want (not like the restriction of a giftcard) or even put the money in the bank (Gasp, who would've thought?).
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
5 Rules of Gift Giving: Who You Should Give Gifts to
1. Parents
They gave birth to you! It's as simple as that. Therefore, no matter what, they deserve to get some appreciation.
2. Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles
We all have that aunt of grandma who spoils you rotten with anything your little heart desires and so much more. Shouldn't they get something cute-sy and heartfelt in return?
3. Siblings and Cousins
Just because you may fight with them, go through phases of wanting nothing to do with eachother or simply have some awkward interactions, doesn't mean you shouldn't give them gifts. Most likely they're the closest family members in age, so shouldn't you have a general idea of what your peers like?
4. Friends and Roommates
This is a no-brainer. If you are friends with someone, you exchange gifts! Forgetting a friend at Christmas-time or at his or her birthday leaves tension in the air with a hint of "maybe we really aren't that close..."
5. Teachers, Co-workers, Bosses
People you look up to, admire or work under should know how you feel! (Or maybe in the case of a boss... they shouldn't) So get them something that says, "You are great!" or something like it.
They gave birth to you! It's as simple as that. Therefore, no matter what, they deserve to get some appreciation.
2. Grandparents, Aunts and Uncles
We all have that aunt of grandma who spoils you rotten with anything your little heart desires and so much more. Shouldn't they get something cute-sy and heartfelt in return?
3. Siblings and Cousins
Just because you may fight with them, go through phases of wanting nothing to do with eachother or simply have some awkward interactions, doesn't mean you shouldn't give them gifts. Most likely they're the closest family members in age, so shouldn't you have a general idea of what your peers like?
4. Friends and Roommates
This is a no-brainer. If you are friends with someone, you exchange gifts! Forgetting a friend at Christmas-time or at his or her birthday leaves tension in the air with a hint of "maybe we really aren't that close..."
5. Teachers, Co-workers, Bosses
People you look up to, admire or work under should know how you feel! (Or maybe in the case of a boss... they shouldn't) So get them something that says, "You are great!" or something like it.
Sunday, March 14, 2010
The Gift That's Two Sizes Too Small
Nothing is more discouraging than receiving a shirt or sweatshirt (or any item of clothing for that matter) that doesn't fit you. Maybe it's that aunt who lives across the country and has a little trouble keeping up with how fast you're growing... so she buys you clothes you probably would've worn two years ago. Maybe it's the penny-pincher of the family, buying you T-shirts that "you'll grow into."
Either way, undersized or oversized outfits are only cool if you intend them to be cool... but these gifts pretty much always are not. Is it really that hard to call someone up and ask them how tall their child is? Or maybe look at some recent pictures?
Clothes that are the perfect color or have a neat design somehow manage not to score the perfect score when they could fit someone half your size.
Either way, undersized or oversized outfits are only cool if you intend them to be cool... but these gifts pretty much always are not. Is it really that hard to call someone up and ask them how tall their child is? Or maybe look at some recent pictures?
Clothes that are the perfect color or have a neat design somehow manage not to score the perfect score when they could fit someone half your size.
Monday, March 8, 2010
The Gift in Disguise
We are all familiar with the gifts that are given not only for the benefit of the recipient: the husband who buys a large screen television for his wife, the girlfriend who bakes a cake for her boyfriend for Valentine's Day.
But I'm sure that you've never heard of a mother giving this to her ten year old son for his birthday:
A blender and a hairdryer.
"What?!" That's the first thing that went through my mind when I heard this as I let out a little laugh. This is the most extreme "gift in disguise" that I have heard about. Clearly, no little boy is going to have any use for these unless he is a budding chef with long hair. Needless to say, this gift was barely disguised!
Unless it is a gift that is made to be mutually used and enjoyed, such as that big TV or yummy chocolate cake, these gifts aren't really gifts. They also completely go against the idea of giving as a means of giving of one's self and feeling happy by pleasing others. Buying things for yourself isn't bad, but when you need to use the cover of a gift for someone else, it's pretty heartless.
But I'm sure that you've never heard of a mother giving this to her ten year old son for his birthday:
A blender and a hairdryer.
"What?!" That's the first thing that went through my mind when I heard this as I let out a little laugh. This is the most extreme "gift in disguise" that I have heard about. Clearly, no little boy is going to have any use for these unless he is a budding chef with long hair. Needless to say, this gift was barely disguised!
Unless it is a gift that is made to be mutually used and enjoyed, such as that big TV or yummy chocolate cake, these gifts aren't really gifts. They also completely go against the idea of giving as a means of giving of one's self and feeling happy by pleasing others. Buying things for yourself isn't bad, but when you need to use the cover of a gift for someone else, it's pretty heartless.
Thursday, February 18, 2010
The Gifts That Never End
Most cities or towns have some sort of merchandise line made specifically for tourists. Snow globes, sweatshirts, sweatpants, T-shirts, postcards, shells, bags or beach towels: you name it, they make it.
As many grandparents do, mine lived in Florida for the winter months every year while I was growing up... Bonita Springs, FL to be exact. I can't recall visiting, but I know that we took a trip down when I was three to see them over Christmas which was the only time I went.
However, each year, my grandmother felt that I needed to have new things from Bonita Springs. Most of the time it was the T-shirts that were several sizes too large: the bright blue ones with jumping dolphins; the yellow ones with old-lady hat designs; the plain white and gray ones with beach scenes and glittery shells; the pale pink ones with flowers; and all with BONITA SPRINGS, FLORIDA splashed across the front.
The horrifying part about these shirts is not that I have a few hiding in a corner... No, I have enough of them from over the years to open up my own store. Literally. Aside from all of the "normal" shirts that I simply didn't like wearing, one section of my closet was dedicated entirely to piles of Bonita Springs paraphernalia.
While some tourist-y gifts are acceptable, going overboard is really not acceptable! So know when to stop buying T-shirts with shells and city name blurbs because if we wanted them, we would ask for them!
As many grandparents do, mine lived in Florida for the winter months every year while I was growing up... Bonita Springs, FL to be exact. I can't recall visiting, but I know that we took a trip down when I was three to see them over Christmas which was the only time I went.
However, each year, my grandmother felt that I needed to have new things from Bonita Springs. Most of the time it was the T-shirts that were several sizes too large: the bright blue ones with jumping dolphins; the yellow ones with old-lady hat designs; the plain white and gray ones with beach scenes and glittery shells; the pale pink ones with flowers; and all with BONITA SPRINGS, FLORIDA splashed across the front.
The horrifying part about these shirts is not that I have a few hiding in a corner... No, I have enough of them from over the years to open up my own store. Literally. Aside from all of the "normal" shirts that I simply didn't like wearing, one section of my closet was dedicated entirely to piles of Bonita Springs paraphernalia.
While some tourist-y gifts are acceptable, going overboard is really not acceptable! So know when to stop buying T-shirts with shells and city name blurbs because if we wanted them, we would ask for them!
Wednesday, February 17, 2010
5 Rules of Gift Giving: When to Give a Gift
And shame on you if you don't!
1. Birthdays
Throughout your life you have one day every year that is centered around you! Just you! Waking up on your birthday morning to a celebration of another year of life that you have experienced is extraordinary. So, it's pretty reasonable to bank on a little extra love and kisses coming your way... and presents. Now that most people have a Facebook, there is no excuse for forgetting a birthday.
2. Anniversaries
OK, so maybe not weekly anniversaries or even monthly anniversaries, but you have to admit that the big ones in a relationship are worth acknowledging. If you don't do something special for your first 6-month or 1-year anniversary you might want to rethink. It doesn't have to be huge! Even a small gesture like making a special dinner and dessert or spending the night out acts as a gift to the both of you, making your anniversary that much more special.
3. Holidays
Whether it is a religious holiday or family/relationship-oriented (this includes Mother's and Father's Day!), holidays are a great way to show others our appreciation and feel fulfilled by sharing with our loved ones. Whether they celebrate the same holidays or not, these small gestures are what bring people closer together. You can go all out, as some do at Christmas, or keep it low-key. But it is important to acknowledge these little days throughout the year by giving to others.
4. Souvenirs From a Trip
Your sister goes to France and comes back with... nothing for you? You don't need to buy out the country but it is definitely a good idea to come home with a few little trinkets for some friends or family members. One of my friends and my older cousin often travel abroad; many times they have returned with jewelry and pottery that has indigenous stones and designs. Bringing back little items for your loved ones allows them to live vicariously through you in your travels across the country or around the world.
5. Just Because
Doesn't it make you feel special to get a little box or sparkly bag when you aren't expecting it? I know I do! Along with the spirit of giving, a surprise gift is the most unexpected and sometimes the most exciting. These just-because gifts remind your loved ones that you're thinking about them and want to acknowledge it, even when there isn't a birthday or holiday nearby.
1. Birthdays
Throughout your life you have one day every year that is centered around you! Just you! Waking up on your birthday morning to a celebration of another year of life that you have experienced is extraordinary. So, it's pretty reasonable to bank on a little extra love and kisses coming your way... and presents. Now that most people have a Facebook, there is no excuse for forgetting a birthday.
2. Anniversaries
OK, so maybe not weekly anniversaries or even monthly anniversaries, but you have to admit that the big ones in a relationship are worth acknowledging. If you don't do something special for your first 6-month or 1-year anniversary you might want to rethink. It doesn't have to be huge! Even a small gesture like making a special dinner and dessert or spending the night out acts as a gift to the both of you, making your anniversary that much more special.
3. Holidays
Whether it is a religious holiday or family/relationship-oriented (this includes Mother's and Father's Day!), holidays are a great way to show others our appreciation and feel fulfilled by sharing with our loved ones. Whether they celebrate the same holidays or not, these small gestures are what bring people closer together. You can go all out, as some do at Christmas, or keep it low-key. But it is important to acknowledge these little days throughout the year by giving to others.
4. Souvenirs From a Trip
Your sister goes to France and comes back with... nothing for you? You don't need to buy out the country but it is definitely a good idea to come home with a few little trinkets for some friends or family members. One of my friends and my older cousin often travel abroad; many times they have returned with jewelry and pottery that has indigenous stones and designs. Bringing back little items for your loved ones allows them to live vicariously through you in your travels across the country or around the world.
5. Just Because
Doesn't it make you feel special to get a little box or sparkly bag when you aren't expecting it? I know I do! Along with the spirit of giving, a surprise gift is the most unexpected and sometimes the most exciting. These just-because gifts remind your loved ones that you're thinking about them and want to acknowledge it, even when there isn't a birthday or holiday nearby.
Monday, February 15, 2010
The Gift That Made Me Blush
Sometimes it is difficult to determine age-limits or maturity-levels when choosing gifts for preteens. For some items, however, it should be pretty obvious that it is just not something appropriate to give to a twelve-year-old.
At the age of twelve I had been involved with the music department at my school for three years. My whole family is very musical and my very non-musical grandmother tries very hard to be involved with all of the concerts and activities that we do. Working my way through my gifts from her that Christmas, I was shocked as I ripped the paper of one away to reveal this book:
Just to, uh, point out what seems to be obvious to me: the two glaring aspects of the cover that would set off alarm bells that this is probably not the best gift for a twelve-year-old...
1. The title includes "SEX" and "DRUGS"
2. The characters in the artwork are missing something rather important: some clothes
In my grandmother's case she probably only saw "Mozart," and knowing that I play an instrument and like to read, figured that this would be a nice present. In any case, it is so important to glance over covers and packaging to make sure it really is exactly what you think it is.
At the age of twelve I had been involved with the music department at my school for three years. My whole family is very musical and my very non-musical grandmother tries very hard to be involved with all of the concerts and activities that we do. Working my way through my gifts from her that Christmas, I was shocked as I ripped the paper of one away to reveal this book:
Just to, uh, point out what seems to be obvious to me: the two glaring aspects of the cover that would set off alarm bells that this is probably not the best gift for a twelve-year-old...
1. The title includes "SEX" and "DRUGS"
2. The characters in the artwork are missing something rather important: some clothes
In my grandmother's case she probably only saw "Mozart," and knowing that I play an instrument and like to read, figured that this would be a nice present. In any case, it is so important to glance over covers and packaging to make sure it really is exactly what you think it is.
Thursday, February 11, 2010
The Gift That Breaks The Piggy Bank
Giving cash as a gift is its own mix of pleasure and pain. For the gift-giver, it comes with the feeling of generosity and knowledge that the recipient will be able to do whatever they want with it. For the gift-receiver, it eludes this freedom to choose-your-own-gift.
But if you think it's always nice to get cold hard cash as a gift, maybe you've just been dealing with the 20's and 100's that aunts and grandmas throw your way. However, cash gifts can be painful: they bluntly show exactly what the person 'spent,' possibly making you feel either guilty or shorted.
At my seventh grade birthday one of my presents was a ziplock freezer bag with money; not just some bills, but probably all of the bills and change my friend had. I still get the image of a little girl with a hammer breaking open her piggy bank, the crumpled bills and mixed coins spilling onto the floor.
While cash gifts can be humbling, showing the generosity of our friends and family, they can also make you feel awkward and uncomfortable. So, don't break open your piggy bank with all that change just for a birthday gift! Or at least head over to the bank and drop it in a machine to get the bill equivalent of all those quarters and dimes. In the interest of the gift-giver: don't empty your life savings on a normal occasion for a gift. And in the interest of the gift-receiver, if you're going to go all out, don't let us know!
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
The Not-So-Personalized Gift
We've all seen the rotating racks with the little notepads, the stationary, the stickers, the mugs with cute designs and the packages of pens that come with an array of name labels from Aaron to Zachary. Then there are the bags with the names stitched in, the backpacks, the t-shirts, the towels, the jewelry and even the picture frames. If you wanted to give someone a gift with their name on it this seems like a sweet, personal idea. Except when the "gift" has their name spelled wrong.
Growing up, this annoyed me to no end. Apparently these companies have no idea that the name Aly exists.
ALI. ALLI. ALLIE. ALLY.
NO.
IT'S ALY. A-L-Y.
Despite this, I have been given the pens labelled with ALLISON. Old notepads with ALISON written in cursive on the front. A hand-made necklace with beads A-L-I. Letters from my own grandmother starting with Dear ALLIE.
Of course, "it's the thought that counts," but in the end it is not my name and that gift is something that should've stayed on the shelves, waiting for a little girl who actually spells her name that way.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
I'm a college student and an only child, so growing up I have had the luxury of being bombarded with all sorts of gifts. I take pride in my own gift-giving abilities and know that unique feeling of getting a gift that you absolutely hate, makes you feel awkward or simply makes you wonder what the person was thinking when they picked it out. Maybe this blog will eliminate some other awkward exchanges?
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